JOKES

CHEQUE.
In the class the teacher wrote on the blackboard: "Write down a sentence using the word 'Cheque' in it"
One of the students wrote: "My uncle gave me a very sweet Cheque yesterday"
Seeing bthe sentence quite senseless and funny,the teacher asked the student to read aloud the sentence and the student promptly read:
"My uncle gave me a very sweet Chiku yesterday."
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DAILY BREAD.
Teacher: In our daily prayer, why do we say,"Lord, give us this day our daily bread? Why don't we pray, for bread for a week atleast so that we need not have to pray for bread everyday?"
Johnny: We pray for daily bread in order to get it fresh!
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LAST SCENE
Director: In the last scene of this film,you have to jump from the 13th floor.
Actor: But in case I die?
Director: It doesn't matter, it's the last scene in the film!
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WATCH.
James: Does your watch tell the correct time?
John: No, I have to look at it!
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FIRST THING TO DO.
Teacher: What is the first thing a king or queen, who comes to the throne should do?
Ramu: I suppose he or she should sit on it!
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NUTS
Boy-friend:I have brought you some sweets because you are sweetest thing in this world.
Girl-friend: Thanks, I have brought you some thing too, Nuts!
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BAD IN GRAMMER
Prabha: "The accuracy of a computer is beyond our imagination"
Radha: "Yes mom! But computers are very bad in grammer"
Prabha: "Why?"
Radha: "Because every time I shut it down, my computer gives the message: Windows 'IS' shutting down!"
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SENTENCED TO DEATH.
King: You are sentenced to death. But I allow you to choose the kind of death you prefer.
Prisoner: I choose to die of old age!
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LETTER WRITING.
Rekha:"Madam, didn't you ask me to write a letter to my friend in the English Exams Paper?"
Teacher: "Yes, what is the problem?"
Rekha: "It has been a month, but my friend has still not received the letter!"
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JUDGE & THE THIEF.
Judge: "Don't you feel ashamed that you come here again and again?"
Thief: "Then you are the one who should be more ashamed."
Judge: "How so?"
Thiesf: "Your honour, I come here twice a month, but you come here every day!"
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GO TO HELL
The deceased grocery man knocked at the gates of hell and asked entrance.
"Why do you come here?" demanded Satan.
"I want to collect some old accounts from a couple of my former customers who died before me."
"How do you know they are here?"
"Well, every time I tried to collect, this is the place they recommended me to."

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LOSS OF MEMORY
"I saw the doctor today about my loss of memory."
"What did he do?"
"Made me pay him in advance."